Postpartum depression in mothers is a serious issue and we are making strides in helping mothers who may have it. We now know Dads can get postpartum depression. In my opinion, we are not paying enough attention to or providing adequate support for Dads, and recent research agrees.

Some Dads try to keep home life going at the same pace it was before baby's arrival. Some Dads try to keep the house spotless and make sure all meals are homemade. These things are great goals, but when everyone is sleep deprived and adjusting to the changes a new baby brings, it can be too much. Unfortunately, some dads might get a few days off work and then have to go back to work which can bring Dad some stress and maybe guilt that Mom is having to take on more while she is recovering from birth than if he was at home to help.

I have seen everything I mentioned above. And I've seen Dads struggle. The symptoms of postpartum depression in Dads is very similar to Mothers. I want to know Dad is doing well so I check in with Dad when I'm doing a postpartum. I want to know that Dad is getting at least 6 hours of sleep in a 24 hour period. I want to know that Dad is eating well. I want to know that Dad is taking care of himself. I also want to answer any questions Dad may have.

I might make suggestions like using paper plates, ordering food in, or going to the store and picking up a few frozen pizzas for meals. I might suggest Dad take naps or get a few hours of sleep at night in a different room than Mom and baby. I might suggest Dad see a therapist if I am seeing signs he is heading into postpartum depression.

I want Dad to thrive when baby arrives. I want Dad to be empowered and equipped to support Mom and baby well. Because I want the entire family to thrive, I ask questions and talk to Dad about postpartum depression. I want Dad to feel respected, valued and heard. I do not want Dad to be forgotten in the busyness of life with a newborn.

Recently I have been able to attend some trainings on perinatal mental health issues.  I have learned a lot in those trainings, but I wanted more than an "academic" understanding of what a mom may experience, I wanted an up close and intimate understanding.

Brooke Shields wrote about her personal experience with postpartum depression in her book Down Came the Rain.  The book was first published in 2005, and helped focus attention on something that was more on the back burner in maternity care.

As I read Brooke's book,  I could see all the red flags that indicated she was at increased risk of postpartum depression.  It was her intimate description of her feelings and thoughts during this time of her life that really touched my heart.  Her emotional journey into depression was raw and heartrending to read.  It brought the abstract learning I have to life.

Mental health issues can come up at anytime during pregnancy and the postpartum period.  It is now recognized that postpartum mental health issues can occur up to a year after birth.  In my practice, I do my best to support Moms in all aspects of pregnancy, birth and postpartum.  I watch for red flags such as overtiredness bordering on exhaustion, concerning mood fluctuations , lack of appetite and other possible signs that may indicate Mom is heading towards having issues.  If I have concerns, I will discuss them and may suggest my client have an evaluation with a mental health professional who specializes in postpartum mental health issues.  There are so many tools and ways to manage postpartum depression that just don't let mothers cope, but help them thrive that there is no reason to suffer.  In an ideal world, no mother would experience postpartum mental health issues, but if I notice something concerning, I will support my client and ensure she gets the help she needs.